Something that has happened over the years is that we tend to spend more time with families that look like ours. Foster families. Adoptive families. Multiracial families.You get the point. We love being around people who 
get who we are as a family. There is great comfort being around like minded people. As we are drawn together we form a community to support each other.
So what makes us a community?
We speak a common language.
We know what to say and what not say. We know how to talk to all of the kids. We know that those entrusted to us are safe when around like minded people because we know that our kids will not be hurt with their words.
We play pitch and catch.
We can communicate efficiently and effectively with each other. Communication is a two way proposition and we get it with each other.
We know the right way and the wrong way.
Most of us have common training or a cultural touchstone. We understand the things that our kids need to heal and thrive.
When we fail we try to get it right.
The great part about our community is that when we fall short we try to get it right. I was recently asked why the Empowered to Connect principles were gaining so much traction in the church. I believe it is because the church is full of people who realized that they were living in the wrong (without Jesus) and changed (repented). This is essential to our community. When we fail we try to get it right.
In the end we are a community because we all feel called to this ministry and we get each other. When we are around families like ours I often think of the end of Black Hawk Down when they get back to the stadium in Mogadishu.
When I go home peopleâll ask me, âHey Hoot, why do you do it man? What, you some kinda war junkie?â You know what Iâll say? I wonât say a…word. Why? They wonât understand. They wonât understand why we do it. They wonât understand that itâs about the men next to you, and thatâs it. Thatâs all it is. –Â Hoot (Eric Bana) from Black Hawk Down
After all is said and done we understand that it is about the kids that God has placed in front of us and that’s what makes us a community.
Ryan North is the Co-Founder of One Big Happy Home and creator of The Empowered Parent Podcast. He is a recognized expert on childhood trauma, a TBRI Practitioner, and develops training materials for parents, schools, churches, and child-placing agencies. Ryan is a sought-after speaker known for his engaging and practical approach to communicating complex issues clearly and relatable to a wide range of audiences.