We strive to connect with our kids as we teach them new skills.  Before we can take away a survival skill, we need to replace it with a new one. One of the things we often suggest to families is for them to do family nurture group in their home.

Before you begin

• Gather some things to help everyone stay regulated: chewing gum, suckers, fidgets, weighted objects, etc
• Practice self-regulation techniques such as magic mustache, chair/floor push-ups, push down the wall, smell the soup/cool the soup, smell the flower/blow the pinwheel.
• Find a “magic feather” to use during your group
• Write down the family rules: Stick Together, No Hurts, Have Fun, Grownups are in charge

Suggested format for Family Nurture Groups

1. Review family rules & check -in (pick one):
   • Ask a question and let everyone take turns answering. (pick one or make one up)
     • Best/worst part about today? (do both)
     • If I could be any animal I would be?
     • Silliest thing I have ever done…
     • When I grow up I want to be (parents answer from when you were a kid or dream job)
   • Feelings game: Mom or dad calls out a feeling and then gives an example of something that makes them feel that way. Then take turns passing a ball between each family member and sharing feelings.  
2. Nurture
   • Take turns giving and receiving nurture.  Each person asks another person if he/she can do one of the following for them:
     • Put a band-aid or wrap on a hurt (emotional hurt could be symbolized by bandaid on the heart)
     • hand/foot massage with or without lotion
     • Weather report -This is a variation of a back massage.  You can ask the person what kind of weather they want and demonstrate that weather on their back. Example: pounding for thunder, chopping for lightening, light tapping for rain, etc
3. Fun with teaching (pick one or create your own):
   • Act out the “wrong way” and the “right way” :
     • Pick some things that you see your family doing/saying often and use this part to practice doing them right/wrong in a silly exaggerated way!  Kids love this, especially when mom and dad really get into it!
   • Yes/No game- Practicing accepting no in a fun way, and practicing giving joyful yes’s
     • Kids ask mom or dad if they can do something silly like eat a stick- mom and dad respond with a no and the child practices accepting a no.
     • Kids ask mom or dad if they can do something appropriate like give a hug/high five or even something silly and mom or dad practice saying yes.
4. Feeding – Take turns feeding each other something yummy.  Ask permission, “May I feed you…” You can also use a silly game for feeding such as eating a donut off a stick, using chopsticks to pick up gummy worms and feed, etc
5. Closure – Close by reviewing the family rules and then praying and reading a scripture together. Alternatively you can do a silly handshake or “pass a goodbye”