We have 6 kids. These cuties are numbers 5 & 6 for our family.
A lot of people told us we were crazy to bring home a kiddo with as many needs as our Addie girl.
The doctors didn’t think she would walk or talk and expected her quality of life would be low.
The judge, on adoption day, asked if we really understood what we were signing up for with her big needs. A lifetime of care.
We thought we did, but no one ever really understands until they have cared for someone who cannot care for themself.
We’ve watched her do way more than the doctors thought she would. And yet often times we are frustrated because we don’t know what she wants. She is frustrated because she can’t communicate what she needs.
There are things our family can’t do because of her limitations. There are places we don’t go because navigating is too hard.
And yet we have seen our other kids befriend the child with autism that others don’t know how to talk to. We have watched our kids help the child with physical disabilities be able to join the group. We’ve watched our kids show compassion and patience for kids who have behavioral and cognitive challenges.
So is it harder than I ever imagined having a child with special needs?
Yes.
Do I sometimes envy those who are done with changing diapers (I’ve had at least one kid in diapers for the last 17 years )?
Yes.
Have I seen God use the hard and broken places to transform our family?
Yes!
Beautiful. Messy. Broken. Family.
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Kayla North is co-founder of One Big Happy Home and is considered an expert on childhood trauma. Along with her husband, she has developed training materials and programs for parents, churches, and schools educating them on trauma and its impacts. Kayla is also an affiliate trainer with Trauma Free World, an ETC Parent Trainer, TBRI practitioner, and the Executive Directory of Tapestry. She speaks at churches, schools, conferences, and retreats nationwide.